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Day #343: Pass the Cheese, I Brought the Wine

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The Story:

"Because Tuesday was just Monday 2.0"

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The Not So Fantastic Reality:

The above story was inspired by the following tidbits I encountered today:

ONE:     I am soooo ready for this string of crappy days to be over. So newsflash Tuesday, I’m over you. Just like I was over your bitch of a sister, Monday. You both suck toenails. I’m ready for some good news, some positive energy, and some relief from a sinus headache that insists on rearing its ugly head at least once a week to the point I can barely manage to function in my darkened cave-like office. So bring on Wednesday, I ready. And to celebrate the death of the twin crappy sisters Monday & Tuesday, I’m treating myself to a much needed and deserved glass of cab sav… or maybe two. Wine- it’s one of the perks of being a grown-up.

Love & Squirrels.

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Day #310: Fresh Batch of Tired

The Story:

A glass o’ wine

I’m feeling fine.

 *

A mouthful of dough, marinara and cheese

One more slice? Yes please.

 *

Would we like dessert?

I guess sharing a chocolate soufflé couldn’t hurt.

 *

All caught up on girl talk

After all I ate tonight, glad I got in my afternoon walk.

 *

Snuggled up on the couch

Finally feeling like less of a grouch.

 *

A bit nervous about tomorrow, hope it goes well…

Ready for it to be over, but how it will go, I can’t really tell.

 *

To keep me from fretting and needless worry

Think I’ll go to bed now, while it’s still early.

 

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The Not So Fantastic Reality:

The above story was inspired by the following tidbits I encountered today:

ONE:      Sorry for the riddles, but my mind is a pulsating weary grey blob at the moment, so it will just have to suffice. Met up with my friend Joanna tonight for a much needed girls’ night and glass of vino. It’s always a great time when we get together, but the moment we parted ways to go to our respective cars, as if on cue, I began to grow incredibly tired. I guess the wine combined with the long day at work, working out (and sweating to death in the 83 degree heat), a little too much pizza/chocolate souffle and an early appointment tomorrow (more on that, well… tomorrow) I’m soooo ready to hit the hay… as they say. Plus, since Andy’s computer died, he’ll be needing mine now so… until tomorrow sweet readers!

Love & Squirrels.

Day #288: One More Conundrum

The Story:

The Seven Habits of Highly Exhausted People:

  1. Work without stopping for 8 hours
  2. Run on your lunch break
  3. Spend the larger portion of the afternoon in a meeting with no clear end result
  4. Ration your caloric intake so as not to ‘go over’ in your food diary on MyFitnessPal.com
  5. Drink at least two glasses of very good white wine
  6. Socialize and share a few quips with fellow employees during a much needed ‘Happy Hour’
  7. Try to come up with something clever to write as part of your daily blog (and fail miserably)

    If only I had more wine...

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The Not So Fantastic Reality:

The above story was inspired by the following tidbits I encountered today:

ONE:      Sorry folks, I know I kind of dialed it in today. Instead of leaving the department social after one drink to come home and write like a good girl, I accepted the drink offer of a co-worker (thanks Tish!) and stayed for another round. This, as they say, is the result. I make no apologies though, I had a wonderful time getting to know some of the people I work with outside of the office and found a new vino that I simply adore (if not just for its name… Conundrum <<must be said in a hushed voice>>). All in all though, I am quite pooped so I bid you adieu interwebs, see you tomorrow.

The only conundrum here is one bottle or two?

Love & Squirrels.

Day #248: On Two Days Before Christmas…

The Story:

(To be sung to the tune of The Twelve Days of Christmas)

On two days before Christmas with my loving family….

A surprise dinner with all the Handleys

 *

On two days before Christmas with my loving family….

Two kids a playin

And a surprise dinner with all the Handleys

 *

On two days before Christmas with my loving family….

Three Handley siblings

Two kids a playin

And a surprise dinner with all the Handleys

 *

On two days before Christmas with my loving family….

Four kinds of cheesecake

Three Handley siblings

Two kids a playin

And a surprise dinner with all the Handleys

 *

On two days before Christmas with my loving family….

Five bottles of wine!

Four kinds of cheesecake

Three Handley siblings

Two kids a playin

And a surprise dinner with all the Handleys

 *

On two days before Christmas with my loving family….

Six calling neighbors

Five bottles of wine!

Four kinds of cheesecake

Three Handley siblings

Two kids a playin

And a surprise dinner with all the Handleys

 

On two days before Christmas with my loving family….

Seven glow sticks a swingin

Six calling neighbors

Five bottles of wine!

Four kinds of cheesecake

Three Handley siblings

Two kids a playin

And a surprise dinner with all the Handleys

 *

On two days before Christmas with my loving family….

Eight “Stop the madness!”

Seven glow sticks a swingin

Six calling neighbors

Five bottles of wine!

Four kinds of cheesecake

Three Handley siblings

Two kids a playin

And a surprise dinner with all the Handleys

 *

On two days before Christmas with my loving family….

Nine hearty bouts of laughing

Eight “Stop the madness!”

Seven glow sticks a swingin

Six calling neighbors

Five bottles of wine!

Four kinds of cheesecake

Three Handley siblings

Two kids a playin

And a surprise dinner with all the Handleys

 *

On two days before Christmas with my loving family….

Ten is the time they left us

Nine hearty bouts of laughing

Eight “Stop the madness!”

Seven glow sticks a swingin

Six calling neighbors

Five bottles of wine!

Four kinds of cheesecake

Three Handley siblings

Two kids a playin

And a surprise dinner with all the Handleys

 *

On two days before Christmas with my loving family….

Eleven, it’s time for sleeping

Ten is the time they left us

Nine hearty bouts of laughing

Eight “Stop the madness!”

Seven glow sticks a swingin

Six calling neighbors

Five bottles of wine!

Four kinds of cheesecake

Three Handley siblings

Two kids a playin

And a surprise dinner with all the Handleys

 *

On two days before Christmas with my loving family….

Twelve midnight and its Christmas Eve!

Eleven, it’s time for sleeping

Ten is the time they left us

Nine hearty bouts of laughing

Eight “Stop the madness!”

Seven glow sticks a swingin

Six calling neighbors

Five bottles of wine!

Four kinds of cheesecake

Three Handley siblings

Two kids a playin

And a surprise dinner with all the Handleys

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The Not So Fantastic Reality:

The above story was inspired by the following tidbits I encountered today:

ONE:      Ah family, gotta love em (right?)… just joshin. After an easy going day spent with my Pops and stepmom, Teresa and being treated to an indulgent pedicure and a delicious lunch things were turned on their head a bit when I discovered The Family was coming over for dinner this evening. No, not the mafia, but close… The Handleys. Overall, I think it was a good night, I got to see one of my cousins and his wife and two girls (3 and 5), my aunt and uncle were here too. To sum up, lots of food, lots of vino, lots of loud conversations, many times being conducted simultaneously, and lots of my stepmom saying in her cute way, “Stop the madness!”. I’d write more but, well… I don’t want to be disowned. 🙂

Love & Squirrels.

Day #161: Too Tired to Think of a Title

The Story:

Four or five “We’ll need a few more minutes, sorry”.

One hastily ordered entrée, I’ll have the eh, uh… steak thingy… yeah that one (turned out to be pretty dang tasty).

Three glasses of pinot grigio sipped slowly- drained a good deal earlier than the conversation.

One waitress who performed an impressive disappearing act around hour two.

At least three “hold that thought, I gotta pee”.

Eight or more stories that began with “So what ever happened to…?”

An entire childhood, two in fact, to reminisce about.

12 years too long between chats.

      days until our next get together?

Dear Jess, please don't hate me for dusting these off... mkay thanks.

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The Not So Fantastic Reality:

The above story was inspired by the following tidbits I encountered today:

ONE:      Sorry guys, but I’m gonna make this one short and sweet since the majority of my energy has been devoted to a long awaited reunion with a high school friend that I haven’t seen… well, since high school. Since the days we used to be inseparable, since the days we played in her parents game room, talked about boys till we couldn’t think of anything else to say, the days where we learned about Biggie Smalls being shot down and we went to my first concert (The Wallflowers, thank you very much). It was awesome catching up with her, I mean we basically lived at each other’s houses, and talking about all those people from the past that made up our world when we were 15 -18 years old. Needless to say, we had a lot to talk about and unfortunately, due to adult (gag me with a pitchfork) responsibilities had to cut short (after only three hours, can you believe it?!?). Anywho, I hope this is the first of many reunions, and Jess- see you soon?

Ah... such innocence, such youth...

Love & Squirrels.

Day #156: The Importance of Being… A Yellow Robot

The Story:

“What a fantastic evening, wouldn’t you agree, Donna?” Donna’s husband, Jacob or “Jake” swirled the last of his merlot and raising the glass to his mouth peered over its rim expectantly at his wife.

Donna, who was not having a glorious anything, looked from her husband to the other’s in their group, none of which she knew personally, and managed to nod. Thankfully the evening was drawing to a close and she could soon retire to the sweet sanctuary of a good book, warm cup of tea and perhaps a hot bath. The thought alone managed to sustain her through the current conversation. Donna looked around the room and hoped that an excuse to escape would make itself apparent, but not seeing any turned back to the conversation. God, did she hate these types of events, nothing but small talk, food too small to eat with a fork but too big to eat in one bite, way too many tables and only three chairs, and they had just run out of cupcakes. Add to that the fact that Donna had been required to wear heels to this soirée for her husband’s work and Donna was officially miserable. The only redeeming thing of the night was the performance of The Importance of Being Earnest that was included in the night’s festivities.

An actual look at tonight's players... bravo! (and yeah, that's a dude playing a chick in the red)

Finally Jake began to go through the motions of beginning to say goodbye and bring their night to a close. About ten minutes later they were walking to their car and began the drive home. In his typical fashion, Jacob began to recount the highlights of the night, running through the entire event as if she hadn’t been by his side for the duration. He especially liked to narrate each conversation they had been a part of- down to the last trivial detail. “Hey, let’s stop at that Quickstop for a drink, I need a Gatorade or something,” Jake interrupted himself long enough to say before pulling into the convenience store.

While Jake perused the drink selection in the coolers at the back of the shop, Donna wandered to the front by the checkout and scoped out all the latest brick-a-brack for sale. Seeing that Jake was walking towards the front with his Gatorade, Donna sidled up to the counter and a box of brightly colored rings immediately caught her attention. In bright neon colors were about a dozen of cheap metal robot adjustable rings. Honing in on a bright yellow robot with nerdy glasses framing his rhinestone eyes, Donna was picking it up and rubbing her thumb over it before she realizing what she was doing. “Cute, aren’t they?” The weathered woman behind the counter smiled as she noticed Donna’s fascination.

“They’re fantastic,” Donna said with an almost reverent tone. “I love this yellow guy,” she said after a few seconds.

“Yeah, he’s my favorite… he needs a good home,” she said and smiled again showing her perfect but smoke stained teeth.

“I’ll take it,” Donna said without another thought and slipped the ring on her finger.

“Good, I like you. And I like that robot, so things worked out all right tonight, that’s a good thing,” the lady responded as she scanned Jake’s Gatorade.

Back in the car, Jake was about to pick up where he left off and then he noticed the faraway look in his wife’s eyes and she absently played with the absurd robot ring. “I’m sorry honey, I’ve been going on and on about what I enjoy tonight and all the great conversations I had. What was your favorite conversation tonight?” Jake looked curiously over at his wife in the dark car, the passing street lights splashing an orangish hue onto her face every few seconds.

“My favorite moment and conversation of tonight was the one I just had,” Donna said with a smile.

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The Not So Fantastic Reality:

The above story was inspired by the following tidbits I encountered today:

ONE:      Tonight I dragged Andy to a work event honoring esteemed alumnus of our college which included a cocktail hour, followed by an hour-long award presentation and rounded out by a presentation of Oscar Wilde’s The Importance of Being Earnest. These sorts of things are not usually my bag, but to be honest, it’s the only way I can afford to go to the theater so I manage to swallow an hour of awkward social situations in order to take in a play (on my employer’s dime, no less). The performance was excellent, of course it’s one of my favorites, but still, it was excellently done. Despite this, I have to say my favorite moment came after leaving the theater and stopping into a 7-Eleven for a tea. It is there that I found the cutest lil robot ever, and he had to be mine. After absently handing the cashier two dollars for the little guy, I started t ochat with her about each of the different robots on display and what we thought their personaility was like. There was the hipster, the flake, the hot girl, the cool dude and then… there was my ring- the yellow one. The cashier agreed that it was by far the best one, and her personal favorite. I could see why. Besides yellow being my favorite color, I don’t know, he just spoke to me, ya know? Funny how conversations with strangers I’m supposed to have a lot in common with, we are colleagues after all, can feel so canned and forced and then, a conversation with another stranger, one that I doubt I have very much in common with at all, can feel completely natural and was, frankly, preferable to all the other conversations that night. That’s the beauty of yellow robots.

And I shall call him Earnest!

Love & Squirrels.