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Day #315: No Commercial Breaks

The Story:

Reason #83- My boyfriend forgets the roast in the oven and yells “it’s done!” as he removed the charred remains of our dinner.

Reason #298- Saw a bicyclist get pulled over by a cop.

Reason #71- Blew the pods from dandelion heads as we strolled by the lake.

Reason #15- My friend actually experienced the rare phenomenon of getting toilet paper caught in her underwear as she pulled them up and the tail of it streamed out behind her for several feet. She didn’t notice until class was over.

Reason #306- I’ve had to forcibly gag my dog several times to prevent him from eating a chicken bone accidently dropped after our weekly WING EXTRAVAGANZA!!!

Reason #44- I met a girlfriend for lunch and we talked for over an hour without noticing. I think I had tacos… or something.

Or maybe they were taquitos...

Reason #90- We have ‘face-offs’. A game we play from time to time where we try to make the crazier face.

Reason #23- Our days have soundtracks and sometimes a live audience.

Reason #147- Major events tend to happen in 30 minute blocks of time.

For a complete list of why I believe I may be living in sitcom, please buy my book coming soon to stores and Amazon.com entitled: “No Commercial Breaks”.

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The Not So Fantastic Reality:

The above story was inspired by the following tidbits I encountered today:

ONE:      Ever have those days where you think, “my everyday life is more interesting than anything some writer could think of’? Today wasn’t really one of those days for me, unfortunately. Either that or I’ve got writers block, both of which are completely likely. While I have quite a lovely day, busy at work advising students on how best to reach their dreams, a great lunch date with a friend I haven’t seen in ages and am so glad to have been able to catch up with (love ya, Heather!) and then a lovely evening stroll with the pups and Andy. Good stuff. Anywho, some of the things that transpired did remind me of things I’ve seen on a Seinfeld or F.R.I.E.N.D.S., like Andy almost burning up dinner when he forgot it was in the oven and yelling out ‘it’s done!’ as he pulled it smoking from the oven. I’m sure there’s more, but frankly I’m tired…

Love & Squirrels.

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Day #292: And Now A Message From My Sponsors…

The Story:

I know I’m being had, still… I can’t help myself.

I watch, mesmerized by the brightly flashing colors.

Thirty seconds, one minute… add them all together and I know I’ll never get that time back. And sadly, I’m ok with that.

I tell myself I don’t care, that I’m not going to participate this year.

Well, maybe I’ll just watch one more…

Laughing at the weak witticism, creasing an eyebrow at concepts that fall short or are just plain weird.

Sling shot babies, cheetah-racing cars, evaporating vampires and blackmailing Great Danes… who will reign superior tomorrow around the water cooler?

More popular in some circles than the main event, perhaps the millions spent are worth it, after all?

Hold that thought… that weird guy from The Office is saying something about something…

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The Not So Fantastic Reality:

The above story was inspired by the following tidbits I encountered today:

ONE:      Super Bowl Sunday. And what’s better than catching the game? Watching the commercials, of course! The fact that these are advertisements for products none of us really need or use, for that matter, is beside the point. So far my favorite is the baby sling shot concept for Dorritos. What’s yours?

Love & Squirrels.