My search was coming to a close, and still, I did not have the object of my desire. Could they really all be gone? Was it possible? It seemed that my worst fear may in fact be reality. Nevertheless, I pressed on, vowing to search deep into the night if I must.
I reflected back, to the start of my journey, how innocent, how naïve I had been. I couldn’t help but shake my head at those earlier times, what a fool I was. A part of me wished for that wide-eyed excitement and expectation of instant gratification, but I knew the truth now and there was no going back. Heaving a sigh I imagined only Atlas could relate to, I brushed my hands on my pant legs and continued my search.
The absurdity of my current situation is not lost on me, and to the common shopper I’m sure I appeared a bit crazed. This realization came soon after I caught a gaggle of post-menopausal women giving me the stink eye as I browsed meticulously through a center rack. To them I must have looked fresh out of the looney-bin- glassed perched on the tip of my nose, several bobby pins and a stray pencil sticking haphazardly from the knot of hair piled on top of my head, a pad of paper swinging from around my neck like a novelty lanyard as I scour each rack of merchandise with a fine-toothed comb (the comb helps with the sorting, I swear).
Despite the negative attention I appear to garner from time to time, I must remind myself of my purpose and not lose focus. After so many hours, so many wasted opportunities and missed chances, I begin to lose hope. Perhaps it’s not meant to be? The thought crosses my mind at least once every hour as my feet begin to swell and my back hunches from strain and stress.
“The store is now closed, please bring your selections to the counter at this time…”
The P.A. announcement strikes me like a javelin to the breastbone. That’s it. It’s over. I failed. Slowly I slink out of the store and make my way to my car. I fall into the driver’s seat behind the wheel, I am too stunned to drive. So I sit… and think. How could this have happened? Did I miss something? Did I look in all the wrong places? Finally, after giving myself a thorough mental kicking, I start the engine and begin the drive home. One question I can’t answer playing on a continuous loop as I navigate each turn and wait for every signal, “Where have all the bow ties gone?”
Arriving home, I walk into the darkened hallway without stopping to switch on the lights, this day calls for darkness and besides, I have had enough of harsh unnatural light for one day. All I wanted was a clip-on bow tie for my dog Dudley to wear on his birthday, now his whole party outfit would be ruined thanks to my failure.
The Not So Fantastic Reality:
The above story was inspired by the following tidbits I encountered today:
ONE: Ever go shopping for one specific thing only to discover that NO ONE carries it? You’ve seen the item countless times before, but now, when you actually are looking for it, POOF! it’s like it never existed. That was my day today, although to be fair I only looked in thrift stores so that might be the issue. I was hoping to find a clip-on bow tie for my mini-dachshund Joey to wear for New Years. After coming up empty in the first few stores, I began to wonder, “where have all the bow ties gone?” and of course this was thought to the tune of the 90’s hit Where Have All the Cowboys Gone. Oh well, maybe I’ll find what I’m looking for in 2012. HAPPY NEW YEAR!!!
Love & Squirrels.