The threat was less than 12 hours away and the professionals had spent all day and night at their posts. With shirt sleeves pushed up to the elbow they consulted the brightly colored charts and graphs like possessed mediums hovering over swirling crystal balls. Vowing to neither sleep nor eat until the danger had passed, or at the very least their public was adequately prepared, these brave souls gobbled up data as it poured in and regurgitated the information in manageable bits to their hungry followers.
Less than six hours now, and the threat still loomed. Dedication had been supplanted by a sort of mania as the professionals took their warning to the streets, all but shouting that the inevitable was coming and those left unprepared would only have themselves to blame. Like the most frantic of doomsday preachers on their street corner soapbox, they began slinging fear-infused statistics and percentages at the public, all but pleading with them to take shelter now before it was too late.
The predicted hour of impact. The community waited with anticipation for the onslaught they knew was mere minutes away. Speaking in hushed tones, they repeated the statistics they heard and compared war stories from years past. Would this be the same? Would they survive? Were their homes and businesses adequately buffered?
Two hours after the predicted hour of impact, anticipation had grown itchy. Surely the delayed arrival was an indication of the monster allowing itself time to stew and develop into a more concentrated cocktail of destruction.
Five hours after the predicted hour of impact and the population had lost interest. Going back to their daily lives of monotony, there was a definitive air of disappointment swirling through office parks and school yards. They had been promised catastrophe and were secretly saddened to have been stood up after so much build up. The professionals were the last to give up, pledging to ‘keep an eye’ on any developments should the populous need to be herded inside at a moment’s notice.
Eight hours and into the evening, the citizens knew they had been had, once again by over-eager ‘professionals’, it’s not even a real science, they would say. Sarcasm and mockery soon filled the void left by the disaster that never arrived. Optimists laughed at the professional’s eagerness to ‘create something out of nothing’, cynics chortled at what they knew was just another attempt to scare the people into a false frenzy as a way to boost attention and ratings.
12 hours and still- no disaster, no monster, no destruction. But we did get a few sprinkles here and there, so… there’s that.
The Not So Fantastic Reality:
The above story was inspired by the following tidbits I encountered today:
ONE: Don’t you love how amped up meteorologists get whenever there is even the slightest chance of inclement weather? Down here in good ol Flo-rid-a they practically wet themselves anytime the radar produces the conditions to slap the state with a little bit o rain or, gasp wind! 100% chance of rain! Flood Watch! Sandbag instructions and materials at your local shelters! Dangerous winds expected! Stay indoors! AHHHHH!!!!! They get so excited, it’s kinda funny (especially when they vow not to leave their weather stations until the threat has passed, like really, it’s ok if you go home and shower dude, we won’t judge). I know our brothers and sisters down south are getting some nasty stuff, but up here in the metro, we, for the most part got a whole bunch of nothing. Ok, I take that back, it did sprinkle a little about an hour ago, either that or the neighbor’s sprinkler system is acting up again… hard to tell.
Love & Squirrels.
P.S. Tomorrow marks the 6 month milestone of this crazy journey, so I would just like to say a big MUCHOS GRACIAS! to everyone who’s read even one of my silly stories. Your comments and support mean so much to me and have honestly propelled me through each day (especially the ones where I really didn’t feel like writing). So, how do YOU think I should celebrate? Let me know in a comment, please and thanks.