Top Ten Reasons Why Road Rules Might Not Apply to You
While Driving in Orlando:
1. I’m a tourist from Ohio and I missed my exit for Disney’s Animal Kingdom
2. It’s raining
3. I have a craving for Four Rivers Barbeque and can therefore park my vehicle on the sidewalk, neighbor’s private yard or median
4. I’m on I-4
5. Oh look hon, there’s another garage sale, make a U-turn here (in the middle of a four-lane road)
6. I’m over 85 and can’t see over my steering wheel, but since I’m driving a land-yacht I’m not too concerned
7. I was confused by the construction on Colonial Dr. so I just created my own lane
8. My car’s AC is broken and I can’t see through the waterfall of sweat cascading off of my forehead
9. I’m on I-4 (bears repeating)
10. I’m still pissed about the Casey Anthony verdict
The Not So Fantastic Reality:
The above story was inspired by the following tidbits I encountered today:
ONE: Either I am becoming that old lady who yells at people to “Slow Down!” as they race by me or the drivers in Orlando are getting progressively worse. Out of the ten examples listed above, ten are based on actual experiences I’ve had as a motorist in the City Beautiful. Combine tourists, rainy weather and I-4 (main interstate dissecting Orlando and leading to all major attractions) and the summer is a dangerous time to be out on the roadways. Other than just shaking your head and cranking up Sublime, (not to mention praying for safe delivery to your destination) there isn’t much you can do to combat the crazy drivers that seem to be around every corner and blowing you out with their crappy base at every stoplight. This was my conversation as Andy and I navigated around town today when I mentioned that people just don’t think the rules of the road apply to them for whatever reason (although I can sympathize somewhat with #3… man that brisket is good… throw in some fried pickles, mac n’ cheese and a Cheerwine… anything goes).
Love & Squirrels.