Hey kids, are you bummed that you’re not old enough for that super sweet tattoo yet? Are you looking for a way to show all your friends how cutting-edge and awesome you are? Think a little pain makes everything even cooler? Well you’re in luck!
Now available in the United States for the first time ever– it’s the trend that’s gone viral all over Europe and Japan… are you ready for:
SkeeterTats! is the hot new trend that’s sweeping America and it’s only getting hotter! All the way from the streets of Japan and from the creators who brought you AntEarrings and Squidy’s Inktastic Chewing gum comes SkeeterTats! Temporary Tattoos.
*Made with 100% natural ingredients!
*Easy to use!
*Lasts for days!
*Over 10,000 shapes and phrases to choose from!
But what is SkeeterTats! you ask?
SkeeterTats! are the newest temporary tattoo craze sweeping the world and the best part, they are all-natural! No inks, harsh dyes or colorings necessary… simply select your SkeeterTats! design, peel the protective backing away and press it to a clean and dry area on your skin. After about 5 seconds, peel away from skin.
In less than a minute, mosquitos chillin’ in the area will be attracted to the 100% natural tonic in SkeeterTats! and will quickly “plump” your skin, resulting in a raised temporary design wherever you placed your SkeeterTats! Temporary Tattoo.
No mosquitoes in your area? No problem!
Come to one of our dozens of SkeeterTats! kiosks opening around the country and we will provide the skeeters! The SkeeterTats! kiosk nearest you can be located by going to our website at SkeeterTats.net. When you visit your local state-of-the-art SkeeterTats! kiosk, simply choose your SkeeterTats! designs, place on clean skin and walk into the SkeeterDome 3000 where millions of mosquitoes are waiting to glam up your boring skin. This process takes less than 2 seconds, so there’s little to no wait to see results! Amazing!!!
SkeeterTats! is sold in all finer convenient stores and your neighborhood big box store. Only $2.95 for two designs!
SkeeterTats! You’ll be itching to get one!
***DISCLAIMER: SkeeterTats! is a registered trademark of TickleFight, LLC and cannot be reproduced, recreated or distributed without the owners expressed written consent. SkeeterTats! should not be used by any person, ever. No more than four SkeeterTats! designs should be applied simultaneously for risk of allergic reaction or certain death. Use SkeeterTats! at your own risk and only after consulting with your physician. The use of SkeeterTats! may result in one or several of the following side effects: drowsiness, dry-mouth, rash, sudden craving for chocolate or pickled cabbage, burning sensation around the affected area, dry-heaving or vomiting, depression, diarrhea and/or constipation, dehydration, use of the word ‘buzz’ with increased frequency, anaphylactic shock, uncontrollable urge to tell corny jokes at inappropriate times, coma or death.
The Not So Fantastic Reality:
The above story was inspired by the following tidbits I encountered today:
ONE: As I mentioned in my last post, I spent the majority of yesterday volunteering at a local animal haven. Usually I am very good about dousing myself with both sunscreen and bug spray prior to spending any amount of time at the haven, but for whatever reason, I failed to do so yesterday. As a result, I awoke scratching the dickens out of the back of my legs and ankles. Upon closer inspection, I saw that my lower extremities were both covered in mosquito bites. Silly Sam. Did you forget you live in Florida, aka reclaimed swamp land? Did you forget that any biting thing out there somehow finds you, before any other walking meat-stick and quickly makes a meal of any inch of your exposed skin? Ugh… So, this afternoon, while waiting for the dryer to buzz, I started drawing circles around each bite. Laughing at my polka-dotted, very pale stems, I thought to myself, this should be a new trend! Forget henna tattoos! Get yourself a temporary tattoo in any shape… just slap some mosquito bait on your arm in a pretty lil design and wait for the magic!
TWO: In case you didn’t catch it in the small print, the company responsible for this gem of a product is called TickleFight, LLC which is a reference to Dane Cook’s stand up that just so happened to be playing while I was writing this… hahaha, come on, I can’t breathe! Cut it out, stop it, I’m going to throw up…. Ahhhhh!!!!! I had to punch my grandma in the chest to get off of me. Classic Dane… I don’t care what you say, that ish is fun-nay.
Love & Squirrels.